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  • Shahan Mahmood

Who Pays on the First Date: LGBTQ+ Edition

Ahh, once again, the LGBTQ community must challenge society’s beliefs and make decisions for themselves. According to the mindset of the majority, a man should pay for the first date. So, what happens when there are two men on the date or no men at all? To some, this is a nerve-racking question that can detract from the date if you are thinking about it the whole time. Let’s ease some nerves and evaluate the options:


Split the bill:


Splitting the bill is usually a safe choice. I genuinely believe that no one could leave upset with this outcome. Treating your partner as equal may be one of the nicest gestures you could make on a date with a fellow queer. A pitfall with this option is that you have to prepare yourself for an awkward moment of silence when neither of you reaches for your wallet first.


If you ask, you pay:



If you’re asking someone on a first date, taking them somewhere nice, and don’t know about their financial situation… Just pay. It’s a simple conclusion. If you’re worried about coming off with extreme top energy, you already asked them on the date, so who are you kidding really?


Didn’t ask, but still pay…:



This is a power move no doubt. If you want to assert your dominance before you even leave the restaurant, this option is for you. It’s easily the riskiest option because it can come off as confident. For some, confidence is the most attractive trait, but it can also portray narcissism to others. So, choose wisely in this playing field.


My Conclusion:


It’s really not that big of a deal. If the moment of paying the bill is what sticks with you from the date, it’s probably not going to work out. No option seals the deal or breaks it, so just have fun and enjoy yourself!

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